ArcaMax

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am in the process of moving and have come to the realization that I have too much stuff. I'm aware that I need to throw some things away; however, I feel selfish getting rid of things. I don't come from a lot of money and often feel like getting rid of things is just throwing money away. By no means am I a hoarder or live in ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My nana is a gossip. It doesn't matter what type of boundaries you try to establish -- she will inevitably cross them and say something she shouldn't. My mom has a complicated relationship with her, not talking to her as often as my nana deems appropriate. Due to this, my nana assumes and makes up reasons and scenarios. I try not...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My boyfriend is currently not talking to me after we got into a huge argument over who should drive. He's usually the driver, but I wanted to take the wheel for the day, which set him off. He feels like I do not let him play his role as a man in our relationship and that I'm often overstepping boundaries. I do not think it's that...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I need a change. I've lived in the same city my entire life and have the same friends I've always had. I even attended college in my hometown, thinking it would give me an advantage because I didn't need to readjust to a new setting. Although it allowed me to focus on my academics, I feel like I am limiting my growth by not ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a 60-year-old single mom, and all four of my children have moved out of my house. It now feels empty, and I'm not sure what to do with myself. My children are my world, and all of my free time went to them when they lived here. Now that my youngest son has officially graduated college and is moving out and getting his own ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: Do you think it's possible to outgrow certain people and friendships? Recently, I've been feeling like I could move on from some childhood friendships. I moved away for college, and I can't relate to some old friends who stayed in our small hometown. I'm growing at a rapid pace, living on my own in New York and navigating ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I work in media and communications, and I was recently offered a role as a media and communications professor. Teaching has always been something I've wanted to do, so I was excited. Just a week before I got the offer, I had a conversation with a friend of mine who has been teaching at the collegiate level for some time. I told ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm visiting my sister, and I've noticed that she has road rage. I've been here for about two weeks now, and after three days riding around with her, I decided to take cabs wherever I needed to go. She yells and honks and rages, and it just feels excessive to me.

At first, I bit my tongue and hoped for the best, but when she ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband and I have been saving for a house, but I figured out last week that he is addicted to sports betting and that a lot of our savings has been feeding his addiction. I was completely blindsided by this discovery; I genuinely had no idea how serious the situation had become. Over the past year, we had been talking ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My daughter is struggling to complete college. She has been in her undergraduate program now for six years and she will need a seventh before she graduates. She is majoring in mechanical engineering with a minor in data science. I told her when I heard that this was her major and minor that it may be difficult to graduate on time...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am an American-born Caribbean woman currently dating an African American man. As we begin to get more serious, I want to introduce him to my family soon. I was raised in an open family that was not xenophobic or exclusionary, so I'm not as worried about him being accepted as I am with him understanding our culture. There are a ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: The other day, my mom called me and shared jaw-dropping information. Due to the current political landscape and potential issues with women having different last names from birth and marriage, my mom went downtown to get a copy of her marriage license. The clerk called her up in a frantic state and told her that the courts have ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My son hides his food intake, and he's been this way for years. I'm not sure if it stems from him feeling like we used to baby him, but he hates when we offer him food, tell him to pack a to-go plate when he's leaving our place or announce that the food is ready. He won't eat when we tell him to, but once everyone is gone, he'll ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: One of my friends and I grew up in similar situations, with one of our parents being alcoholics. We shared our experiences with each other, and we each expressed that our biggest fear is to turn into our parents. Recently, my friend has been going through some familial issues and has been drinking. Every time I'm at her house, ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently discovered that a new friend of mine has a different political opinion than I do. Since then, I have stopped reaching out and asking to hang out. The other day, she confronted me to ask why I've been distant. I gave her the honest truth: my morals, ethics and beliefs in equality and human rights prevent me from being ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I love my mom, but she treats every little thing like an emergency, and it's starting to wear on me. Whether she needs help changing her phone settings, opening a jar, finding a contact or even choosing a dress for an event that is months away, everything is urgent to her. She'll ask me something repeatedly (even when I've ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: How do I break off a friendship that I recently made? I am in the same professional networking organization with a woman, and we attend its monthly events together. I have found her to be combative and rude, and I don't want to have to deal with it anymore.

The final straw was when I invited her to a white party my friend was ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am having severe anxiety attacks about losing my job. The company I work for has been doing small reorganizations of my department all year. It feels like I am just waiting for my turn to be let go. I am a poor interviewer, and I don't have a large network. Since the economy is so bad, I am scared it may take me years to find a...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I've been fasting for years -- sometimes for my faith, sometimes for my health -- and overall, it's been a meaningful practice for me. The structure I follow is usually water or tea throughout the day, then one meal after 6 p.m. The challenge is, I've started to notice that when I go long stretches without food, my mood can shift...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: Recently, I presented a classmate of mine with an opportunity to step into her career. We were talking about career goals, and she mentioned she wanted to gain more experience. I knew of a low-stakes event that would allow building connections with industry professionals, so I shared as many details as I could and let her know I ...Read more